Originally published in RuMagazine June 2007 issue

WHY WOMEN CAN’T ENJOY SEX

By Patrick Wanis, PhD -Human Behavior & Relationship Expert and Celebrity Life Coach

Why are so many women having a challenge enjoying sex? And are they even meant to enjoy sex?

Surveys reveal that at least fifteen per cent of women never experience orgasm—and many more women fake it. Few women feel good about their bodies. Society and religion generally deny or blatantly condemn a woman’s right to sexual pleasure. One in three women have been molested as children and as adults complain of feeling like damaged goods or feeling dirty – plagued by guilt and shame regarding sex.

Our attitudes, beliefs and ultimately our enjoyment of sex and our body are determined by what we learned and experienced as children. The inability for most women to enjoy sex and their body is the result of:

1.      Negative sexual experiences as a child or adult

2.      Condemnatory teachings by religion and society towards sex and the female body

3.      Denial of sexual pleasure expressed by parents or adult caregivers

How male-dominated societies control women

There are many religions and cultures that teach that women are not meant (or allowed) to enjoy sex or even their bodies. I lived in West Africa for a couple of years and studied the history and origins of female circumcision and infibulations. Circumcision involves cutting or removing the clitoris while infibulation is the practice for young, unmarried girls of the surgical closure of the female labia majora by sewing them together to seal off the female genitalia, leaving only a small hole for the passage of urine and menstrual blood. Once married, the stitches would be undone, allowing the woman to engage in intercourse.

Although there are conflicting theories about the original intention behind these practices, history reveals that these practices began in Ancient Egypt with the removal or splitting of the hood surrounding the clitoris. Later, it spread throughout the Northern parts of Africa with Arab slave traders and developed into various forms of female circumcision and infibulation, including the removal of the clitoris. The UN and the World Health Organization call it “female genital mutilation” and it still occurs today in various countries and cultures around the world. This practice transcends religion and culture and there has even been one documented case in the US.

(more…)

By Hollie McKay

Jude Law cheated on Sienna Miller, Peter Cook did it to Christie Brinkley, Kate Hudson reportedly did it to Chris Robinson and rumors have been flying recently about whether New York Yankees star Alex Rodriguez is doing it to his wife, Cynthia.

But infidelity isn’t just confined to rich and famous, and experts say it has a lot to do with … temperature. Flings, they say, are a summer thing.

“Warmer weather has a huge impact on our hormones,” says Patrick Wanis, a relationship expert for Playboy Radio and Cosmopolitan magazine. “Summer is the most sensual and erotic time of the year. We show more skin, we’re emotionally more open and there are many more social and vacation opportunities to be led astray.” (more…)

 From the Age Newspaper in Australia, June 12, 2007

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2007/06/11/1181414218940.html?page=fullpage#contentSwap2

On the couch

RUSHING to the aid of wailing Paris, the jailbird who only feels comfy in a five-star Hilton, is former Aussie journo Patrick Wanis, now a human behaviour expert and celebrity life coach in, where else, the US.

“Paris Hilton might deserve to be in jail but what she truly needs is to participate fully in meaningful therapy and rehabilitation urgently,” Wanis diagnoses in his media release.

“If Paris Hilton’s entourage continues to take away her power, her sense of justice, right and wrong, then she will have a complete emotional breakdown. And while her team continues to teach her to manipulate the system, it only serves to exaggerate and worsen her problems of entitlement and narcissism.”

We never would have guessed the spoilt brat had such serious issues.